Archive for May, 2013

rabbi wolpe

Wise and true words from Rabbi David Wolpe via FaceBook. I wanted to share them with you…

“We use negative emotions as explanations but what of positive ones? “I hit because I was hurt.” “I lashed out because angry.” Less often, “I gave because I was grateful.” “I helped because I was joyous.” Use your impulses to goodness as spurs to action.”

When we lead by example, others are likely to follow suit…

Be happy and well,
Sari Roth-Roemer, Ph.D.


IMG00223-20100706-1433…summer is here. The time of year equated with letting go and enjoying life. For many of us, memories of childhood days spent in joyfulness. Exhilarated by the freedom of life without homework and tests. Excited by time spent without boundaries. Playing whole-heartedly with friends. Losing ourselves in pure satisfaction with the moment. Day after day after day after day all blending together in a sunshine haze of happiness.

How do we honor this once beloved time of year for ourselves now? Can we allow ourselves to really stop for a moment and take a break? Take time to pause in our regular routine. Take time out to stop and be grateful for all that we have. Take time to connect with others. Take time to have an adventure and seek out new experiences. Take time to sit back, relax, and just breathe in the enjoyment of the present moment. Take time to put a smile on our faces and allow ourselves the pleasure of happiness…

Are you up to the challenge…the challenge of taking time for summer happiness and freedom…if only for a moment? While this could mean an exotic vacation, it really doesn’t have to be that. It doesn’t even have to cost any money. All it will cost is the intention of taking the time to take care of you by purposely pausing to enjoying the moment you’re in. You certainly deserve that, right? Maybe you’ll start swimming each day, or sit down and drink a glass of lemonade with someone you love, or catch up on an old movie, or read that book you haven’t had time for, or even write that book you’ve been meaning to write. Whatever you decide to do will be just fine, as long as you decided to take the time to pause and enjoy your life. So, close your eyes now, breathe deeply and ask yourself in this moment, “how am I going to take a break this summer?” Now listen for the answer. Now decide how you’re going to make it happen. Will you? As always, the choice is truly yours.

Be happy and well,
Sari Roth-Roemer, Ph.D.

Screen shot 2013-05-01 at 3.40.57 PMTime to Rethink, Reinvent, Recharge? Then the latest issue of AZ-Lifestyle magazine is for you! Check out my newest Mindset column “A New You? Making Your Dreams Real” and get going on following your heart’s desire!

A New You? Making Your Dreams Real

As the seasons progress, Spring moving ever closer to Summer, the earth warming and teeming with new life and growth, our heads and hearts fill with thoughts of new beginnings. We dream of something new for ourselves…new job, new hobby, new vision, new adventure. We dream of being reinvigorated. We dream of replenishing our souls. But how?

Rick Hanson, Ph.D. author of “Just One Thing” asks us to be curious. Ask yourself,  “What are the dreams that matter most to me?” You know the answer to this question. This is where your intuition comes into play. The answer that comes will be from your heart. Try to remain open to the answer, rather than allowing yourself to be dismissive, critical and cynical of what you hear. It is our own judgments and our attempts to be purely logical and rational that blocks our dreams. Dreams are not logical, they are passion filled. That’s not to say that further down the line of turning dreams into reality that logic won’t enter the picture. For now, don’t be scared of letting your heart speak its language of emotion and excitement as the dream begins its journey.

The next step is to write down the answers to the question, speak them to people you care about, or maybe even make or collage pictures of them; whatever manner of expression suits you. Let the answers fill your thoughts, your conversations, your dreams, your life. The important part is turning the internal into external — a form of giving birth to these dreams, if you will.

So how do we move from the infancy of our dreams into maturation, from contemplation to reality? By doing, of course. Think about the steps you need to take to get where you want to go. Write them down. Envision the outcome of completing each of these steps. Make them a priority in your heart; that’s where they come from after all. Start today. Start as soon as you’re done reading this article. Make a commitment to yourself to spend time each day with this dream. Keep track of your progress. The fastest way to get momentum is to start moving forward, knowing that everything that you do today will bring you towards your goals of tomorrow. So get moving now.

The important part is to allow yourself to enjoy each small step in the process, rather then making the mistake of living for the future. We simply can not experience the future in the present. Right now is the only reality we have. So let yourself enjoy it fully. Notice how it feels right now to move one step closer to your dream. As you move forward, the reality of this dream may grow and change. That’s okay, as long as you keep nurturing the dream with your heart, it will transform as it needs to, allowing you to simply enjoy the process of watching it unfold.

Possibly the most essential piece of turning your dreams of change into reality is the belief that you can accomplish this task. I’m talking about having faith in yourself and your ability to achieve your goals. Think back to other tasks or dreams that you have accomplished in your life. Noticing the feelings that come over you as you recall these achievements, remind yourself that you are fully capable of achieving what you want. Tell yourself, “I can really do this. I can have what I desire.” Smile at the thought of it. Instead of focusing on obstacles, focus on possibilities. Focus on the areas in which you have control; these are the areas where you can exert influence. The mistake that many of us make is to focus on wishing we could control things that we cannot. That, of course, is a waste of time and energy. Accepting things as they are and focusing on what we can take care of in the present is the direct pathway to getting what we want.

This may take some work. But if you make a point of caring for and nurturing yourself along the way, you will no doubt make it. This means being kind to yourself. How can you fulfill your dreams if you aren’t taking care of the dreamer? Work hard, but also rest, relax, breathe, give and receive love, say encouraging words to yourself, smile at the vision of the new you that you are creating…

So what are you waiting for? The time for a new reinvigorated you is NOW.

Be happy and well,
Sari Roth-Roemer, Ph.D.

P.S. Interested in learning more about how to gracefully embrace change in your life? I’ll be giving a free webinar on “Embracing Change” on  Tuesday, June 11th at noon EST. Click this link for more details: .  You need not be a Smith alumnae to attend. Anyone interested in attending is welcome to join in on this free webinar.

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